bleh Life

Life is getting more and more stressful. The new year is coming and I'm turning 18. Two pretty big things and that's not all. I need a job to do the things I need and want to do. For school, hanging out with friends, getting a car, possibly traveling to many different places. Of course it goes both ways with the car and a job. I need a job to get a car and a car to get to the job. No one seems to want to hire either. I'm losing. Losing things and people to this pitifully annoying world. I hope nothing too tragic happens to any that I love whether it be a long time friend or someone I almost basically met yesterday. Everyone is important to me. Everyone really matters no matter what other say. I love you all.

Love...xe

Love. It is a concept which not but a few really seem to know. Something which means more than just lust that this world seems to tell us it is. Its friendship, commitment, hardship. Things we must live through. Things we try so hard not to understand. It should be understood better. That beautiful but abused thing called love. That amazing but totally shot down thing that should be cared for as a flower, it is indeed quite fragile. It costs more than we treat it. It is the most beautiful thing that is on earth even if people mistreat it. Those that are able to keep it know that it isn't all fun, easy or amazing. But love stays whether they don't feel the lust. You just need to calm down, need to keep going and respect whoever you are with. Desecration is another big part of love. It helps. And trustworthy. Trust is part of the beauty. Of you you must also strive to be trustworthy so you may be trusted so people feel as if they want and need to be trustworthy. Love and care for everyone and everything whether its hard or really rather easy. I love you all.

Decisions

Everyone has a hope of being whatever they want whether that person believes in hope or if someone else decides that they can't. It isn't their decision. Its never anyone Else's decision. Its only the person that is thinking. The soul that keeps the decision in their head. If you don't even know at all what your decision might be, that's fine. You've always got time. You have the time to inspire or be inspired. This time is to be used as learning. Learning your possible decisions for the future. There is always hope for what you want but concentrating on what you really need should be very close to heart at all times. Its very hard sometimes just to know what you need while its easily known what you want. I hope to inspire the needed thoughts and ideas to the questions "What school will I go to?"I or "will I ever get married?" Or "should I travel?"Or "what are my thoughts on religion? Should I just believe what my parents/friends believe?"and so on. Always believe you are made exactly right. Don't be insecure, especially because this society seems to be full of it, even those people that act arrogant. They don't have it either. Its just their decision to act like leaders but acting will stop some day. Whenever anything like that happens, be there. Be there for people and find how it makes you feel when you aren't only thinking of yourself. Love everyone. Live life like you mean it. Care for the least of these that are on the streets. <3

Friends (And then some)

For me there is only mostly one friend that really seems to care. She is my best friend and she lives a thousand miles away. How do you not just drift away? We talk sometimes and when we visit one another we talk and just kinda hang out. It's no stress at all and a beautiful thing to have a best friend. Someone you can rely on. Someone, when all else in your life may fail and everyone has left you to fend for yourself, you have one person who you always know will be there. If you can't find such a person, search for as long as you have to. It's one of the meanings in life, to have someone to depend on and to return the favors whenever able. It's too good to pass up! Hopefully everyone realizes that you don't have to be a certain sex to have a best friend that is the opposite sex. Sometimes it's almost better. And you should never feel like you have to be in a relationship just because it looks like you are and because friends decide you should. Always be your own person. I am hopefully a voice well heard to people that need it.

Happiness (May not makes sense...)

I can't believe how happy you can be! You can be the happiest little thing on earth! Something may happen that makes your day and off you go on your little cloud to happiness. The most happy you've been. It's one of the most amazing things that may happen to you. You can't believe how this happens. You should be able to obtain happiness by making others happen which, in turn, sometimes makes them think they should try making others happy which may include you! You build other peoples happiness and confidence and they might not be able to contain your joy. It matters not! Either way is amazing.

You always have days where you're really happy at least for a little bit and it must end. It might become better though! Never lose hope. You always can get back up on your feet. You should always have someone to encourage you. First you don't, I can really try and help. Whether you're a close friend or just a person somewhere in need of one little smile of kindness, I will try. Everyone needs cheering up and a reason to be on this cruel and discombobulated world. So don't give up on everything and everyone yet. There is at least one person who always tries to care about everyone.

Reminiscents

Its the feeling when you have nothing left but a choice. Whether to be happy and keep going or to be unhappy and decide life is over anyway. Yes you have that choice because God gave it to you. When people seem to leave whether in death or they walk away we chose to either be depressed or mad or we could chose to appreciate the experiences we had with that person or thing. We may morn those things but not forever. We may reminisce but not every second. It is a beautiful thing to reminisce and possibly shed a tear or two that means a lot to us. But always remember the good things to be able to keep on with your life. Yes it is hard but God will help if you just let him.

Dizzying Depression

Depression is something that you feel whether it be your heart breaking because of someone or it could be genetic where you can't stop it because of what was put inside of you. We must never dwell on depression though. Life is still ahead of us and we can't stop that although wish and think we can. The pain may remain but we have to push through. Sometimes your depression may also be dizzying and confusing because we focus on one thing and so we don't really know what is going on otherwise. We need to wake up to ourselves and decide to push on. It does sometimes takes days or much longer but if we strive to stop it may happen that you'll feel better. If you have even one friend that is sincere in her speech and the best friend in your life then talk to them about your troubles and possibly never speak of them to anyone else. You may feel relieved to say something to someone. Just choose the right person. Someone that will help you with everything that comes your way and is loyal and who will not say anything even if bribed to. Know someone before you don't know them. And if you want change, change yourself and you may see change around you.

Smiles

I love it when people smile. I love the different smiles too. The smiles that people use for when they're really happy or the ones for pictures but some of the best smile are the ones that come from those so few people that don't smile very often. They have some of the most beautiful smiles. They may not be used to it but the smiles from them are ever so very much more sincere. They make you just wanna hug and maybe shout for joy! It's one of the most beautiful things on earth to see this happening. Of ourse there are those people that just seem to have naturally beautiful smiles. The only thing is that sincere smiles are the most beautiful. If you want to see this just look around. Fake smiles are as blunt as Simon Cowell but sincere, they are as beautiful as the Sunrise or Sunset or even the Moon. Sincere your smile everytime to make the world at least a bit of a happier place.

Beauty in the sky

It is quite interesting to see the beauty of snow in the morning when it starts falling off your car. It shimmers and shine to make itself known among all else when we don't seem to care nor look around. We seem to have to stare. Down our phones and computer that are almost worthless when it comes to nature. We see only the things that are suppers to be important. Reality sets in sometime although with most it takes longer. All you need to do is sit peacefully outside under the sun, or possibly the stars or even trees. You then appreciate things and you don't need those things you said you need as in Facebook, twitter, YouTube, among other things. Stop what you're doing and enjoy the outside that is there! If you live somewhere not easily appreciated with those trees that shall forever be small then go out of where you are more comfortable and live life in peace. I recommend such an experience for everyone no matter who you are or what you are doing. Its important to live peacefully rather than this obnoxious life society has led us to believe is amazing. Totally reckless and terrible. We should live better. Better as in peacefully and with more true and sincere love. Not lust... but love.